Let Go of Anger and Resentment and Make Forgiveness a Way of Life

09-13-2026Weekly ReflectionFr. Emmanuel Ogla, VC

Dear Brothers and Sisters in Christ,

There are wounds that medicine cannot heal and debts that money cannot repay. Some of the deepest wounds are caused by words, betrayal, rejection, injustice, or the failure of someone we trusted. And sometimes the hardest prayer is not “Lord, bless me,” but “Lord, give me the grace to forgive.”

The readings today place forgiveness at the centre of Christian life. They remind us that we are people who have received mercy from God, and therefore we must become people who extend mercy to others.

Sirach speaks in the first reading very directly: “Wrath and anger are hateful things, yet the sinner hugs them tight.” The author asks: How can we expect God to forgive us if we refuse to forgive our brother or sister? This is a profound lesson. Resentment often hurts the person carrying it more than the person who caused the hurt. When we refuse to forgive, we allow yesterday’s injury to continue controlling today’s life. Sirach is not saying that what happened was insignificant. Forgiveness does not mean pretending that an injustice never happened. Rather, it means refusing to allow injustice to possess our hearts forever.

St. Paul tells us in the second reading that: “Whether we live or whether we die, we are the Lord’s.” This is important for forgiveness because Paul reminds us that our lives do not belong to ourselves alone. If I belong to Jesus, then my relationships must also be shaped by Jesus. I cannot say, “I belong to Jesus,” while deliberately allowing hatred, bitterness and revenge to rule my heart. Christ died and rose so that we might live differently. Our identity is no longer defined by the person who hurt us. We belong to the Lord.

In the Gospel reading, Peter asks how many times he must forgive, thinking seven times is generous, but Jesus says, “seventy-seven times.” Jesus teaches that forgiveness has no limit.

The unforgiving servant shows the contradiction of receiving God’s great mercy while refusing to show mercy to others. We ask God to forgive us generously, but sometimes we forgive others very reluctantly. Pope Francis reflected on this very point, saying that the parable teaches us that “just as God has forgiven us, so we too should forgive those who do us harm.” All three readings of today leads us to one central truth: A person who has truly experienced God’s mercy cannot remain permanently imprisoned by resentment. God’s mercy received must become mercy given. The Gospel makes us to understand that someone must be courageous enough to say: “The hurt stops with me. I will not pass this hatred to my children. I will not repay evil with evil. With God’s grace, I will forgive.” That is Christian maturity. But does forgiveness mean allowing people to hurt us again? No. Forgiveness does not mean approving evil. It does not mean refusing justice. It does not mean remaining in an abusive or dangerous situation. It does not mean that there should be no consequences for wrongdoing. Forgiveness means that we surrender vengeance to God and refuse to allow hatred to govern our hearts. Sometimes forgiveness also requires boundaries, distance, justice and healing. Always remember how much God has forgiven you; do not make your heart a warehouse of old wounds. Forgive because you are forgiven; we do not forgive because the other person deserves it. We forgive because Christ has shown us mercy. The Cross is the greatest proof of this. Jesus did not respond to humanity’s sin with revenge. He responded with mercy. Pope Leo XIV teaches that Christian forgiveness does not mean ignoring injustice. Rather, forgiveness transforms the way we seek justice. He says that evil must not simply be punished; it must also be repaired, with attention to the good of persons and the common good. Pope Francis emphasized that forgiveness is difficult, but when we cannot forgive on our own, we can ask God for the strength to forgive. You may not be able to change what happened, but you can be healed of the wounds of pain and unforgiveness.

Forgiveness is not weakness. Forgiveness is freedom; it places our wounded heart back into the hands of God. May God grant us the grace to forgive and be healed of our hurts. And may He teach us to forgive as He forgave us. Amen.